Author Topic: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'  (Read 3915 times)

October 11, 2014, 01:20:39 PMReply #15

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #15 on: October 11, 2014, 01:20:39 PM »
Quote from: guest1
You also must take into account that we live in times where many people simply do not want to have families. This is also due to the societal and technological we have undergone, particularly in the richer western nations. Those individuals who are not looking to have families anymore are instead focusing their lives on finding as much personal pleasure as possible and sex factors into that heavily as in this society sex is the most valued pleasure to be attained. I think however this is not new to our society and has happened repeatedly through the different historical eras.

October 11, 2014, 01:21:14 PMReply #16

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #16 on: October 11, 2014, 01:21:14 PM »
Families are not for everyone; nothing wrong with that. But people need to be honest with themselves about their desires, being consistent and aware in thought and action.

The problem is that many people are trying to serve two masters. You can’t simultaneously want a committed life partner (which most people actually do want), without making a selfless commitment to your partner. Saying, “Hey, I want the pleasure and comfort you’re going to give me”, while then failing to give that back to the other in the fullest extent desired for oneself. These half measures, dipping one’s toes in the waters, are a huge cause of deeper, more destructive problems, and usually ends in a failed relationship.

If you want a loving, lasting relationship, one needs to view sex as what it will bring to their partner and the relationship first, personal pleasure should be the last consideration. In viewing one’s own partner and relationship maturity level honestly and objectively (this is not at all easy for most, which is why the commitment of marriage is a healthier general rule), if it is seen that sex could bring any resentment, strangeness, confusion, or hurt to the picture, sex should be ruled out as an option until the maturity of the relationship is past the possibility of negative consequences occurring.

“I think however this is not new to our society and has happened repeatedly through the different historical eras.”

You will recall the fate of these past societies at preciecely the times of these levels of decadence described in the Kolbrin, the Bible, and other historical documents…  :-\

… Which is why I advocate for a stronger medicine …

October 17, 2014, 12:43:22 PMReply #17

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #17 on: October 17, 2014, 12:43:22 PM »
Quote from: guest1
Read through these posts a few days ago...then I read in another one of my books that we do not, and indeed cannot complete our cycle of physical lifetimes until we have left our accumulated wisdom on the Earth plane. I have a feeling that just might have a ring of truth to it, and it caused me to rethink how I just observe a lot of the time, and don't post my thoughts very much anymore. Before I go on, know that I respect the wisdom within the Kolbrin, yet I believe it's been a victim of a few of mans laws being added, and that they were done with good intention. That being said...maybe I'm being selfish, but I see there are probably more personal reasons behind all that has already been said above me.

Being a perfectionist she's set her path on an extremely difficult lesson in life. It's going to be a very rough ride, and I prefer my series of little lessons. It's my belief that she chose this path before hand for a reason...she needs to learn something...what that really is we'll never know, unless she writes a highly publicized article many years from now.

When and if she ever gets to the height of the perfectionism she seeks, the first lesson will be the most difficult. If I could talk to her personally I'd tell her it's ok that her nails weren't done perfectly that day, that he didn't shower a few hours before the moment, that that the sheets were wrinkled. That it's suppose to hurt like hell, (that's a lesson in itself), and it may have been made that way so you're more cautious about having "relations", and part of giving yourself completely to another person. Giving isn't about a good feeling. It's a sacrifice of part of yourself, and Yes it hurts. That men aren't perfect and she'll never be either no matter how hard she tries. That she'll never make her mother completely happy, and that by now she probably has her mother wondering why she doesn't have a grandchild by this daughter.

But if I'm right, the Mother, (or father), brags about what a great career her daughter has, and that everything her daughter does she does at the height of her mothers expectations. The mother, (or father), probably brags about the daughters business accomplishments, wealth and income, and rarely mentions the lack of any real men companions or children in the daughter life. I can hear the travels the daughter has made abroad, and how she's advanced her earning potential. This allows the daughter to feel like she's accomplished all her mother wanted...yet there's that empty place...That one act of bravery faith and trust in another human being she's not made. The one thing that will truly set her on a path for many more lessons.

She's at a stuck place. Like a holding tank. It may be that she'll have to repeat this whole cycle. How do we know she's just not an old soul who's already learned that sex isn't the answer, and that she's a better, more learned advanced person? Nothing she's said leads me to believe that. She's using a law made by man to justify her own fear.

I don't see her article as one about faith or doing the right thing at all, but it's about fear The fear of failing at something, the fear of giving the most precious thing she holds dear to the wrong person, the fear of failure and of emotional pain. Exactly what she thinks her mother fears, the same fear that's been implanted inside her at the end of a party when she was just a child. If I'm right probably many more times that we're not made aware of.

I'd love to hear about someone who gave herself and learned from her mistakes not to give herself so freely again. That would be something to celebrate. But just like very Virgin Mary story...the expectations in this article leave many to feel like they're bad. You're not bad! No one has failed...there's no failing this class. Only growth and learning.

No, I don't believe we should just have relations with whoever. No way! It's so very much more. But don't do it for the wrong reasons, or not get too close for the wrong reasons either. You're here to learn and grow. I post these things not only from personal experience, but from observation. Go ahead Len you can now chop off my head.  :) it's ok.

October 17, 2014, 12:43:51 PMReply #18

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #18 on: October 17, 2014, 12:43:51 PM »
I’m glad you commented, Diane, and have missed your general input over the past months…

You know, I really can’t disagree with too much of what you said. Fear does seem to be a motivation of what she’s written. But I would also note that some of that fear is healthy and justified (not all). She explains earlier on in the article that a few guys she dated in college could have been her first, but ended up betraying her in either blowing here off completely or revealing they had other girlfriends quite after the fact.

She also sees guys not willing to wait for her. And sadly, that is often the case these days. From her own experience she sees guys walk away shortly after they realize they have to wait to get in her pants. If sex were the deciding factor whether a partner stayed with you or not, would you give in to it? I wouldn’t….

God’s law, man’s law, either way… we see too clearly how most people would rather use us to their own advantage rather than care about or love us for who we were. Why take some chance on that, knowing through action that the person you’re dating would leave you if you don’t give it up to them? This morality was instilled precisely because people tend to use each other, and that following these rules tends to foster commitment and love.

You know, guys often privately talk about how there are women for pleasure and women for wives. Generally, a guy has it often made up in his mind which is which depending upon how easily he can get her pants off… Most women may find this disgusting, but sadly, they tend to facilitate their own degradation in this manner these days… Honestly, I can’t blame this girl for not wanting to go through that mistake…

It might teach her more to give in… just as much as it would teach someone more to get thrown into a fire rather than just telling them it’s going to burn. But that’s life, sometimes we need to fail and hurt to really learn. Other times, it is enough to be told the fire will burn, and even other times it is enough to get close enough to the fire that it almost burns you to learn. People can learn the easy way, or the hard way. I myself tend to try to help people learn the easy way… but I’ll happily support them if they are determined to learn the hard way…

October 17, 2014, 12:44:27 PMReply #19

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #19 on: October 17, 2014, 12:44:27 PM »
Quote from: guest1
I also would say that the current rampant hedonism and materialism that we see is a natural result of the advancement and prosperity attained in the West. If there's one thing that the Kolbrin makes emphasis upon is how societies get spoiled when too much comfort is reached. I guess this is a great validation of the Kolbrin's philosophy as it has happened just as it said it would.

Right now many people don't see much Sense into going into a committed relationship and make families when they can pursue personal enjoyment without any added responsibilities. People still have a biological craving for certain things but at the same time the artificial circumstances of society lead them to not take it too seriously.

I assure you that if suddenly a worldwide catastrophe hit us and human population would dwindle and exist in a more challenging situation then people would go back to valuing the traditional customs pretty quickly.

October 18, 2014, 01:31:04 PMReply #20

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #20 on: October 18, 2014, 01:31:04 PM »
Quote from: guest1
Len, you're a wordsmith. I admire your ability to make your point and do it so poetically. And ive now read the Kolbrin from start to finish twice and im yet to find a book filled with more wisdom. I remember the part you posted from the Book of Creation. All very true. However, I do side with Manuel a bit in the sense that we are living in a new time where our society is experiencing a bit of a backlash from the thousands of years we have oppressed woman. While I fully support the feminist movement and the liberation of a woman's sexual self, I see the "rubber band" effect of those things playing more into the "marital mess" we are seeing today than anything else.

Len, I agree with you that there are things causing sexual problems that weren't there before such as porn and just good ol' over indulging in sexual partners. We have access to desires we didn't even know we had now at the click of a mouse. As they say, "you cant go back to Playboy after you've seen....", well, ill let everyone fill in that blank for themselves.  ;) But those fantasies could not be fulfilled through a medium like porn without the woman of our time consenting to be in those videos (I realize the topic is not porn but I think you get why im bringing it up in this feed). I fully understand that many are brought in against their will, but not all. Not even most by a long shot. Its actually become far to regular of a career choice in my opinion. Now, by no means am I blaming the problems of the topic at hand on woman. This topic is everyone's responsibility. But until the backlash that I mentioned is over... until the "rubber band" snaps back and forth and back and forth until coming to a rest, things will never be like it was. I have a feeling that we are in for a very long road ahead filled with new ways and ideas of what family means to us as the human race. In my opinion, the entire future is very up in the air and uncertain.

I was just thinking the other day how bad things have gotten and the term "greatest generation" came to mind. Thinking of the 1940's and 50's when times were simple and things were "right". But then I really gave that time some thought and I started to think, "back then doctors promoted cigarettes. Woman were oppressed. Blacks had to use different bathrooms. The US dropped an atomic bomb on hundreds of thousands of innocent men woman and children. Led was in paint and everything else it shouldn't have been in. Cars had no seatbelts. Amphetamines were sold over the counter. On the flip side marijuana was schedule 1'ed with heroin ..." I mean, the list goes on and on. Now, I look back and think, "greatest generation ever"?!?! Sorry to everyone from that time, but what were you people thinking? lol And that was pretty much how everything had always been in the world since as far back as history goes. I mean, what has the world been thinking since the beginning of time?! Maybe its easy to sit here and say all this now, but I guess that's just the benefit of circumstance (I rarely get any, so ill take it lol).

What im trying to say is that its been real easy to keep everything "proper" and "right" when men have so easily ruled over the woman of this earth with an iron fist. And now that we are experiencing the collapse of a foundation built on sand everyone thinks the world is doomed. I guess im starting to see it differently. I'm starting to see it as the soul of the human race correcting itself. The Phoenix metaphor comes to mind. Spiritually, we are burning this mother down to rise from the ashes later. The Masons say "Ordo ab Chao"... I say, "Chao ab Ordo". But who knows, if im wrong, ill admit to it later. Great topic though. Much thanks Len. Love and Light.

October 18, 2014, 01:55:01 PMReply #21

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Re: 'When guys find out I’m a virgin'
« Reply #21 on: October 18, 2014, 01:55:01 PM »
Thanks for the kind words.

Chris, you’ve brought up a lot of interesting points here, which I’d like to address in detail, but will have to answer in more brevity than I'd prefer do to time and space considerations. Points will be quoted below, then answered in a different order than you wrote them.

Quote from: guest1
I'm starting to see it as the soul of the human race correcting itself. The Phoenix metaphor comes to mind. Spiritually, we are burning this mother down to rise from the ashes later. The Masons say "Ordo ab Chao"... I say, "Chao ab Ordo".

The legend of the Phoenix is an apt one. I will say that neither you nor the Masons are incorrect. It is a cycle. The orders of life, society, and all of nature follow a cyclic pattern arising from chaos into order or stability. Nature tends towards higher, more diversified, and complex forms and patterns using untamed matter and energy as her clay. We do the same in our societies, sciences, technology, philosophy, art, etc. Beginning with a cold, hungry, frightened, and ignorant savage, and growing into a master of his environment… flying around the world in the matter of hours, and being able to reshape the genetic code of life itself!

But when systems of stability stop building, stop growing, or remain stagnant, they break down. They rot from within do to an inability or unwillingness to grow or evolve beyond a certain point. Sometimes this has to do with a flaw in the pattern of the system itself, that only becomes apparent and self-destructive after it has grown large enough to cause damage. To illustrate, a tiny crack in the foundation of a structure may not be noticeable when it is first laid down. It may not even be noticeable after several layers are added onto it. But eventually, time, or further building upon a structure with a small flaw at its base will begin to widen and make more noticeable that initial small flaw. At this point, the faulty area in the foundation needs to be rebuilt or repaired. Sometimes it cannot be repaired, and a new structure must be built from scratch.

But here the problem of inertia arises. The system becomes ‘comfortable’ with itself. It keeps adding more weight onto the flaw, or stops building altogether until time brings the flaw to a breaking point within the entire structure itself. At this point, stability becomes, once again, chaos…

Now, mankind has a wildcard in this mix. Mankind has the ability to consciously alter, extend, and rebuild cycles in a manner no other self-contained system on Earth does. A fault in the Earth’s crust cannot repair itself. A tree uprooted and placed in an unaccustomed environment cannot suddenly make itself accustomed, nor can wolves suddenly live off of grass once the deer are gone. Nature herself may slowly evolve the species as a whole for these changes, but the plant, animal and mineral cannot do this for themselves. Humans can. We can change our environment, change ourselves, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually in a conscious manner and a power with which nothing else except the goddess of nature herself contains. Thus, we ourselves are little ‘gods’, or if you prefer, made in the image of God.

While not (at this point) having absolute power to completely remold ourselves and environment, we do have a tremendous latitude in which to work and reshape. In science, many spurious systems of the past have been discarded for more effective replacements. Or, likewise in science, formerly seemingly incompatible systems begin to learn to integrate to form a vaster, more comprehensive system (such as reconciling Newtonian physics with quantum physics). This also occurs in religion and political systems. (See the ending of slavery and the feudal system, or the Protestant Reformation, Christianity from Judaism, or the syncretism of the old Culdees merging Druidism with Christianity.).

Left to themselves, any of these systems would return to chaos. This pressure of inertia is a constant force operating on mankind and everything he does. Sometimes a entire society or civilization needs to be scrapped and rebuilt. Most often though, there are only certain elements within the society that need be repaired or rebuilt. And remember, our species, having the power of the ‘little god’, can peacefully and smoothly repair or replace anything from a simple school of science to an entire civilization. Giving into inertia, however, is also our choice, which renounces our divine birthright, and allows Nature to do violently what we can do intelligently and peacefully.

All can be accomplished… and chaos and disaster much more frightening that what we presently face has been overcome by the adaptive and divine nature of man. This is why I see so much hope for us, even now, in the midst of such threats facing us; because there are answers, and because mankind has the ability to implement them. We have done so in the past, and shall do so again (even if we choose not to in our current Age).

Thus, as you write, “The Masons say "Ordo ab Chao"... I say, "Chao ab Ordo".” Both forces, or philosophies, are correct. But the former chooses to adapt, change, rebuild, evolve, and generally claim his divine birthright… the latter stagnates to the pressure of inertia and renounces his divine birthright. Sometimes a bit of a conscious mixture is required… ;)

This is the eternal war within this dimension, the duality of good and evil, light and dark, stability and chaos, push and pull, yang and yin. And we have the ability to manipulate these forces in whatever given alchemy we desire, or allow them to manipulate us…

Quote from: guest1
I do side with Manuel a bit in the sense that we are living in a new time where our society is experiencing a bit of a backlash from the thousands of years we have oppressed woman.

Unfortunately, the ‘backlash’ of the feminist movement and ‘free love’ has done more harm to women than men (For one small example, women overall are more predisposed physically and psychologically to long term monogamous relationships then men. Allowing casual sex, and wanting to take on roles generally better suited to men has damaged her own instinct and happiness, corrupted her natural femininity, and left her alone and barren… while to men, she is nothing more than a notch on his belt. Thus has woman worked against her own interests, a being no longer to be protected, loved and adored, but used and discarded like yesterday’s trash.), and greatly damaged the culture overall. What the feminists did not understand was that ‘equality’ (in the sense of equal rights) is not the same as uniformity. Men and women, while they should have the freedom to make decisions on an equal basis, are not the same. Girls develop differently from boys. Instincts, thought patterns, emotions, intuitiveness, physical attributes, social interaction, and on and on, are very different. In attempting to build an asexual world, with gender roles removed and casual sex condoned, creates a very confused and damaged individual. Examples abound in this, and create all manner of disease and perversion, but space and time requires me to move on for now. Perhaps later I shall further elaborate.

To summarize, equality yes, uniformity no. Gwineva much to say on this, highly recommended!

Quote from: guest1
We have access to desires we didn't even know we had now at the click of a mouse. As they say, "you cant go back to Playboy after you've seen....", well, ill let everyone fill in that blank for themselves. But those fantasies could not be fulfilled through a medium like porn without the woman of our time consenting to be in those videos

Perversions like sodomy (in heterosexuals), sadomasochism, bestiality, pederasty, and general pedophilia can be exacerbated and emboldened by pornography, but they were not created or discovered by this industry. These perversions are caused by character defects springing from lack of healthy, balanced, loving relationships as well as bad parenting in childhood. These are not natural desires coming from a well-integrated individual, but subconscious expressions of pain, loneliness, anger, and regret in the form of perverted sexual desire. Sex is the physical expression of love and union. Subtract love, and sex finds nothing equal to compliment it. So instead, the sexual act pairs with the worst and lowest drives. It pairs with sickness, and still not satisfied, it demands often greater and greater heights of depravity, thus becoming a drug, and the pervert needs more extreme experiences to get his fix.

Quote from: guest1
I was just thinking the other day how bad things have gotten and the term "greatest generation" came to mind….

A lot of your criticism of the mid-20th century generation is not without merit. But I’d like you to consider the feminist reaction to this, and what I wrote about that above. This ‘rubber band’ effect is like an unthinking lashing out, that throws the baby out with the bathwater. I think it is clear that there were positives and negatives to that generation, as there are also positives and negatives in our own. The answer is not at all to ‘return to the 50’s’, or even return to the days of the ancient Keltic culture, or even Atlantis. The answer is to first become aware of the causes of our problems, and once aware, repair or rebuild faults lying within the smaller ‘systems’ of action and philosophies within the larger system of society.

I have every confidence we can do this, and it will be done, as imbalances are not sustainable and ripe for destruction or transformation. It is, again, just a matter of how it will be done… consciously, willingly, and peacefully, or unconsciously and violently. It will happen either way, but if the path of inertia is chosen, the outcome may not be what we expect or desire.