Home & Family
I know of a marriage where both husband and wife desired children, but the marriage was fruitless. Yet after they were divorced and remarried both became parents. How can this be?
This proves that both parties were physically capable of having offspring. Their first marriage was barren because no incarnating ego was drawn towards it. There can be several reasons for this. Unless an incarnating ego is there and destined to be re-embodied through a particular couple the physical efforts of the latter will be fruitless. If physical factors were the only consideration to be taken into account there would be no reason for the first marriage to have been unfruitful while the subsequent ones produced children.
It has been said that marriage is the greatest of Earth’s challenges, and it may well be. The tragedy of a broken marriage is not so much that the parties have found it necessary to end their association as the fact that their life together may have been unproductive in wisdom, insight and tolerance. Some marriages are fated to be and just as fated to end whey the two individuals concerned have learned all they can from each other and worked out together whatever kharma was involved. However, what all too often happens is that lessons are not learned and the same mistakes are repeated in a subsequent marriage, and in this case the kharmic consequences can be dire. If two people feel that their marriage has reached breaking point it is very important that the parting be achieved without the production of negative kharma, which comes about through negative actions and emotions. Every effort should be made not only to sever the marital tie in a responsible manner, but also to accomplish the much more difficult task of severing the kharmic tie, or more difficult still, the frequency link. If the kharmic tie remains then the outcome may be that the two will go through it all again in some future incarnation. It is also a fact that sometimes, not often, the divorce itself is the kharmic reason why two people may have come together in the first place; or the
persons involved may have in some way predetermined the situation to see whether they have evolved to the point of parting under positive circumstances. A divorce involving negative emotions and attitudes will certainly bring negative kharma into being, but to remain unhappily married, tolerating the situation with resentment, regret and hostility, is also productive of much negative kharma. However, to divorce irresponsibly, without consideration of all the surrounding circumstances, especially when children are involved, is even more conducive to negative kharma.
The failed marriages seem to get the publicity, there are many good ones. It is not so much that marriage has failed as an institution, as that society has failed to support marriage. The mass media do little to enhance it. Marriage has lost its status, it has become devalued and this is because of society’s attitude towards it. It will always remain as an institution and the family will always be the ideal social unit, but how well marriage serves society is dependent entirely on the value placed on it by society at large and the individual members of society. It will never become outdated because it is ageless and enshrines the ultimate in human relationships; however, certain aspects of it have to change with the times. The home is the citadel of family virtues and marriage is the sanctum of love. The status of marriage is closely linked with the status of women as defined by themselves alone.
Yes, and so does fate, but of course the kharma involved can be either positive or negative. The law of kharma is universal and guides unerringly. It will follow an entity through incarnation after incarnation until Harmony is established between all causes and effects. An intimate relationship Always involves two people; one may learn the lessons this time round while the other may not. Ideally the two should get there together. Everyone has to be adaptable enough to modify ideas about personal relationships and to relate to another with accord, understanding and consideration. If this is learned by one partner in one life and not by the other, then the latter will have to face the same situation in another life, but in all probability with someone else.
Present day social attitudes are not, as many people erroneously believe, the outcome of social evolution. Society has been conditioned to the acceptance of certain mores, attitudes and standards by detrimental influences. One of the most insidious of these influences is the mass media, with the entertainment industry running a close second. In fact in some areas these two are difficult to separate and they are certainly mutually supportive. So social attitudes are moulded by sinister influences into what they now are and it is these influences rather than
society itself (which is only the victim) that are to blame.
Allowed is the keyword here. Allowed by whom? Remember that man is given both freewill and choice, and it is expected that he will exercise due consideration and responsibility. It is the right of every child to be conceived in love and responsibility and no child should ever come into the world unwanted. Mutual love is sufficient to hold two people together
and is sufficient reason for their being together, but it is not sufficient for parenthood where at least one other person is to be considered. Each parent of a child has the responsibility of selecting the other parent as being fit for parenthood and it is a sad reflection on our society that this is not sufficiently taken into consideration. While we are careful in selecting the best breeding stock in animals so we may get the best strain, we take a less responsible attitude when it comes to children. Yet this is an inescapable responsibility and one for which there will certainly be an accounting. There will come a time when the one who is an unwilling or irresponsible parent must seek embodiment anew and perhaps he or she will be reborn into a family where he or she is not welcome. Or it may happen that the unwilling or irresponsible parent of one incarnation becomes childless in the next. Children who are reincarnation of suicides, and therefore destined to die in childhood, are often born into families having a kharmic debt to liquidate.